Comfortable Enough to Jaywalk Part Two

Here is an email exchange from a buddy and me while I was at work...............  Check out the date.

On Thu, Oct 24, 2013 at 2:37 PM, Stuart Bowker<bowker.stuart@yahoo.co.uk> wrote:

Right. I am going to run you over in a Honda civic. I will give you $100 for every mile under 10mph. $200 for every mile under 20mph. $500 for every mile under 30mph. $1000 for every mile under 40mph. And $2500 for every mile over 40mph. E.g I run you over at 25mph you get $5500. How fast do I get to hit you. There are no guarantees of your safety and no special medical treatments. If you get hurt we have to call and ambulance and wait for it. 

My response:
                                       On 24/10/2013, at 2:42 PM, Scott Hall <shall@costco.com.au> wrote:

I think I would ask for about 11 to 14 MPH, $1600 or so. 

Would maybe go higher if I had insurance that would cover all expenses.

Well...........................On November 18th of 2013 I was indeed struck by a car and for some reason no one paid me $1600.  Let me set the stage, it had been raining HARD in Sydney all day and rather than take the bus to the train station I was offered a ride.  I gladly accepted and was dropped off at the corner across from the station.  Wanting to make the light and about 5,000 previous lights in my life I was willing to jaywalk/cross on a red.  On this day I was halfway across the intersection when the turn arrow sprung on my and I found myself in front of a car that was ready to roll.  (Had this been America I would have anticipated the turn arrow and none of this would have happened).  Being as I am an angry driver I did not want to piss this driver off, so I was quick to take off in one direction or the other just to get out of his way.  I take weird stances in life, like the severe anguish it causes me when I am wasting someones time.

My options are, go back across the street and wait out the whole 30 seconds mind numbing, non candy crush playing boredom.  Or, sprint for it and get to the other side.  My issue: blind corner around the car I was in the way of.  Like I have learned so many times throughout the years, my mind is more athletic than my body and today I was going to pay the price.  I take a step in the direction of the station and realize that I can not see around the car and think better of it.  With the rain, my dress shoes, and my inability to stop on a dime and change directions, I upended and landed on my ass with a maroon car barreling down on me.

First instinct was to get my head out of the way, second was to squint, throw up my forearm to stop the car, and then brace for impact.  The car skid, and smashed into me, sending me skidding across the concrete. Before America turned against him because it became popular, Dane Cook had an wonderful joke about this very situation.  Ill highlight the true parts.


Three weeks ago one of my dreams came true. 
I finally got to see something I've always wanted to witness live. 
I finally saw someone get hit by a car.  ( Sadly I did not get to see it)
Nailed, this guy got hit right in the hip. (Arm and torso)

This guy gets nailed.. this is the setup. 
He's walking down the street and he's doing that wacky speed walk...  (jog walking across the street to catch the light)
he's got the buds in his ears, 
So Johnny Tambourine (Scott Hall) is walking down the street, 
he's got the "not a good time to cross" signal. Yep
As he's going across, I see the car *car noise* coming down the street. 
*collision noise* 
The guy goes flying into the air, his shoes flew off.  Skid on ground, backpack stays on
When you get hit by a car, sometimes your shoes will fly off.  Right one did
Sometimes your pants will come off. Holes ripped in them, down to one pair of work pants
as the car was coming towards him I reached out and I said, 
"ohhhhh. ohhhhh." 
That's all I could think of to say. 
Theres so many things now in retrospect that I would love 
I would love to have been like "you're about to get struck by a vehicle!!!"   One car honked....I think
I did not have time to say "You're about to get struck by a vehicle" 
so I went with "ohhhhh!" which is like a concerned moan. 
The guy gets tagged okay, the greatest part of the story. 
He's in the air flipping around, Ground skidding
t this is how he lands on the other side of the car.   Middle of intersection, popped up instantly, adrenaline RUSH
and he starts walking around, embarrassed.  OH LORD, Felt so stupid
He's trying to play it off like he didn't just get hit, by a car.  I really did, waved at the driver and apologized and took off for the train
People around him are like... 
--"Oh my god! Oh my god! Are you alright? Are you okay?" 
He's like ... 
--"I'm fine, I'm fine. Seriously, I'm fine. I'm a little bit hungry. I said that I couldn't go to the hospital, I had a basketball game to get to..................

The skit goes on, but that is pretty much the gist of it for me.  After the lady told me to go to the hospital and I said I had hoops, I put my tail between my legs and just walked until the train came.  I felt more stupid than hurt, luckily, maybe magically I was not hurt that badly.  Played in my game and hit 7 three points.  Was pretty sore the next day.


I know a whole post and that is all that happened, minus the internal bleeding and ruined work pants.  I should have bought a lotto ticket that day.

Upcoming posts:
Friends from America coming to visit
Thanksgiving in Australia
Its starting to heat up
Flight home booked.......but when and where am I headed first??





(March 3rd, Thailand and maybe more)

Breaking Bad- 11/13 Updated

Since coming to the great country I have had to make a couple of sacrifices.  And for the most part that has been a good thing.  Due to the outrageous prices of about everything........except the .30 McDonald's ice cream cones, EVERYTHING is 50% more.  Including some of my vices.  This includes, Diet Pop, Alcohol, and Energy Drinks.  Luckily Costco has provided me a cheap outlet for an every now and again .80 Diet Coke, but the other two are being purchased less and less.  And I am not good at math, but I think less buying is leading to less consumption.  Other bad habits that have been quite easy to break are candy (never ate that much anyway, for $3 a bar, Gas- don't drive and have not ridden in a car for months (they are getting my money on the jacked up rail pass though, and gambling, can't afford it.

A few bad habits I have picked up

-Several phrases and terms: lads, reckon, unlucky.  I will lose these quickly upon return to the states I hope.

- Being ok with having no clue what is going on in the world: is the government still on strike?  I can't even tell you who is in first place in the NFC East- Cowboys??

- Gossip Girl- UGH, I am embarrassed, but I have all 6 season at my disposal

- A commute- not going to do that when I get back.  1 hour give or take each way, what a waste, which leads right into my next one

- Candy Crush: I may not be eating candy at this time, however I have had everyone's fill of Candy Crush.  I think I am on level 385, ha what a joke, I know exactly that I am on level 385 and have been for 2 days now.  If someone could write a letter to the company and tell them to make an end so I can quit that would be great.

Estimated Return Home:  Late Feb, Early March.  Still need to book my flight, but it's looking around that time.  Work ends at the end of January and then I hope to travel just a bit more.

One request that I have been receiving a ton of is, what are you doing down there.  I did a fairly decent job of outlining my travel time, but other than those amazing home gym photos I have not really summed up a typical day in the life if Australia Scott.  So......

5:30 AM- First alarm, unless its Monday, then it is first and final alarm to get up

6:10 AM- Second alarm, won't go back to sleep, but refuse to get up, so I just lay in bed mad

6:20 AM- Get up and shower for work, dress in the hallway mostly to be polite to Stu the roomie (yep sleeping in a bunk bed, bottom luckily)

6:35 AM- Grab a $2 coffee from 7-11 and catch the train to BFE, where Costco is

???- No idea what time the train is scheduled, but I wait till one that is going my way comes and get on it.

CANDY CRUSH!!!

7:30- Get to work around a half an hour early because I can't handle being late, check fantasy football, emails, hide in the bathroom to avoid starting to work before 8.

8-4:27- I don't really like this time of my day.  Soul crushing might be an understatement

4:28- sprint to try and catch the bus to catch the train home, usually its late, which is agonizing.  You know when you are waiting at a stop and the bus does not show up, the time comes and goes, but still no bus.  You are approaching the next arrival time, and then two buses show up at once, your late bus, and then the one that is on time.  Mine is always the late one.  Really sets the tone for a commute.

4:???  Same as the way to work, get on a train headed home

Candy Crush, or zone out and listen to another Adam Carolla podcast (current listened to count around 200)

5:45PM- Arrive home and depending on the day of the week I will have something to do.

Monday- Basketball league up North

Tuesday- Basketball league by the Bay

Wednesday- wash clothes, buy food, play cards.  Note: any task that involves going somewhere is done on foot, meaning that it takes longer than back home and I can only do so much at once. Like carrying groceries or getting to and from basketball games.  I still love the transit system though.  Very efficient.  Would have really enjoyed taking a train from Issaquah out to Seattle for basketball games, or UW games, I can not stress enough how much I hate riding a bus, in any country.  

Thursday- Sit on the couch and watch some stupid British show for 15 minutes to just relax, then go change and get ready for some prime time lounging OR get our dream team together and head to trivia night at one of many many many bars.  This team consists of whiz kid Dan- American who knows an insane amount about geography and general trivia, very smart guy, stinks at movies and sports....we are a good pair.  Then you have previously mentioned Brit, Stu, Stu is our Australia expert with a great grasp on current events, British and other random sports, and various other categories you would find in normal trivia.  Then we usually have a few stragglers that are good for an answer or two and most of the time talk us out of a correct answer so their contribution is next to nothing and in a couple people's cases negative.

Friday- Get super excited and be totally over stimulated, usually run to the store and not buy anything because I really want to go to the bottle shop (liquor store).  Buy a case for the weekend, run out that night and then be forced to come back again on Saturday, or not drink, not drinking actually usually happens.  Saturday is the day I lay around until noon and then head to the outdoor courts to hoop.  Sunday is reserved for the Dawgs and sleeping.

Other things that have happened since my last update.

My Monday basketball team won our championship game and finished 11-0.  Here in Australia they call every championship a Grand Final, which always makes me laugh.  It could be the final of our Monday basketball league, or the last hand in a rock, paper, scissors best two out of three and it would be a GRAND FINAL!!!!!  So dramatic.  Anyway, the league was not great, as my 29ppg 12rpg 3bpg avg would suggest, but it was fun to get out and run each week.  I have never scored that many points a game since grade school, it was kinda cool being the best player again.  Is that sad??  NOPE, ok a little.

Halloween has come and gone and this is kind of funny.  Brits/Aussies call dressing up for a costume party "fancy dress."  No that does not mean nice clothes, it means wearing a costume.  In addition they all dress full gore (blood, fangs, black everything, ripped clothes and such), so instead of skanky nurses, you would see a respectably dressed, undead, still bloody, pasty face nurse.  I think we do it better, much better.  We dressed Stu up as a mummy by ripping bed sheets and wrapping him up.  It was a half-assed job that took about 25 minutes.  He had tons of gaps and about one wrap around his head.  We walked in to the party and after no more than 45 seconds he was told he was a nominee for best costume.  So, when I say I think we do it better, I know we do.

Card Games:  I have made the full conversion from guy, into old woman.  I bring my own bags to the supermarket, I take public transportation everywhere, and now I can play the game Bridge.  A group of us have taken to the game and enjoy it even though its still a bit too complex.  Fun game, much like driving a stick shift car it was something I thought I would never learn to do in my lifetime.  I was wrong.

Hoops/Race weekend, This past weekend Stu and I had a all sports weekend, with a Sydney Kings game on Friday night, and then the Randwick Horse Races all day Saturday. The tickets to both were free, but only the races were worth the price of admission. Sydney was playing fellow west coast rival Cairns and it was plain to see that both teams were over matched from the start. I know these guys are way better than me...taller, faster, stronger, but man did I feel like I could have gone out there and lit up their weak 2-3 zone. I posted a while ago that everyone out here plays a zone d, which applies to their pro teams as well. To sum up the game we saw 2 dunks, a lot of bricks and one pretty awesome split the d tomahawk drive to the hoop. Final Grade C- 

Knowing that we would need a good night sleep, we took it easy Friday night and were up bright and early for the track. Met up with some of Stu's Rugby friends and were at the races by Noon. One of the guys father had a horse in the first race, we got their just in time to see it finish dead last. Bummer. But saved me the $10 I would have bet on that guy. All in all it was a sunny, amazing day and we all walked away up a bunch of money on racing, but down a bunch on drinks. Race three Stu and I both lied about the horse we bet on and then silently celebrated when our actual bet won the race, and quickly realized that we were both full of sh*t. Maybe the most entertaining part of the day is the outfits everyone wears. Guys in suits and ties and ladies in dresses and all the crazy hats you could ever think up. Think of the most insane art you can imagine, and then turn that into a hat. Bird's nest, yep, why not, anything is fair game at the races. No mint juleps though. Bummed about that, since I have never had one. Overall race experience B+, only because I got sunburned. .

No idea what the deal with this background coloring is, but I can not seem to shake it.  Apologies.